The Small town complex & Nicolas Black

Earlier today I got a messsage from an old dear friend of mine from London that one of my old friends had walked into her house!  That's the magic of the  internet/whatsapp/messaging. ... its instant. 

But it was a kind of a special friend she had run into... And it brought back a lot of memories Almost a decade ago, this charming(in a geeky sort of way that i like) had asked me out through a friend. A nervous me decided to meet this boy for lunch. It would be harmless, plus a good meal to someone living in a pathetic hostel was always  welcome. i didn't think it would admit to much. I thought i was rather boring and run of the mill compared to the hundred of super smart articulate Bangalore girls my college boasted about( also popularly known as the small town girl complex).  Wearing  a 'reasonable' choice of clothes that was both modest and regular a.k.a boring (it was a plain baby pink collared shirt) i wanted to make the statement that i was ' just randomly stopping by and i had not thought about it at all..,.. the reality was it was the first time any of this had happened to me and i must have ironed my shirt at least 6 times before i wore it.

The boy was nice to me,let me order a lasagna from a  popular restaurant close to my college which i felt terrible about wasting partly because i was too nervous and depressed that i made  someone spend money on me (gosh... how naive was i ).But what i did remember that i had an interesting conversation when i was making sure no one from college or anyone else saw me so i was adjusting my seat most of the time and turning my head awkwardly around. I don't think i allowed myself to enjoy as much as i should  have a perfectly nice lunch. We met on and off and emailed each other(the era of usa.netand yahoo!) for a few days in the coming weeks/months but i was too much of a prude i think to take it forward. .. Like i told my friend in London, it was my self imposed moral code that stopped me from it. I think where i came from ' good girls' didn't do things like that. We were always 'friends with guys' and were going to get good jobs.. nothing else.  The potential progression to 'girlfriend status' was something that made me run in the other direction and turned me into a bundle of nerves .

 I often felt guilty to even experience  mad partying unless i was dragged out back in college days... and trust me living away from home i had enough and more opportunity.I wonder if my self imposed moral code held me back in experiencing life a little bit.

I wonder if it would have later helped me especially in the matters of the heart.I guess we arent brought up to date boys so most girls either do it behind their parents back and rebel and the other ones become like me, prudish goody two shoes inside but try to show the exterior world  that everything's cool.

I didn't remain (atleast in my head) a prude for ever and eventually did  have the guts to take things forward with a boy i liked who eventually became my husband later(no credit to me) on but i did have hiccups along the way.  I was not honest with my feelings earlier in many earlier potential relationships and my first intinct was always to run, look the other way  and not think about the complications.  But to Nicolas Black (obviously my code!) I will always be thankful for giving me the experience:) Here's to you...

A Great day...

Yesterday was a great start  to the New Year J Which is unusual considering  most new year days I usually do nothing. Perhaps it had to do with a friend in town. We sped of to ‘Britannia’,an Iranian café with an old world charm. Nestled in a  fairly European colonial looking  neighborhood which is so  far removed from the andheri east suburbs I live in it  feels like you are on holiday the minute you step inside. With a  doddering yet friendly octogenarian owner who goes around chatting up with people around and taking their orders  this little café  is all about what is written on their tissue towels ‘ There is no greater love than the love of eating’

Fussfree and minutes later,our table was full of Berry Pulao, Chicken Sali, Mutton Cutlet, and the most delicious caramel custard. Filled to the brim we set off the Chor Bazaar. Narrow streets with goats running everywhere the friendly uncles around guided us to Mutton Street . It was difficult to keep track of the 3 of us as each one would disappear into a shop and would be wonderstruck by the goodies, film posters, old gramophones, antique phones, telescopes that were on offer.  None of these things are really mandatory buys or are things ‘we need’ but we did end up picking up an antique clock  (who knows when we’ll come back).We found our way back to Taj and after leaving our car there we sort of wandered about in Colaba Causeway and finished it off with a drink at Leopald. We were exhausted by the end of the day. One thing that really stood out that no matter where we were people were so friendly and helpful. Whether they were chatting on the phone or playing a cards game with their cronies, they stopped, gave us directions..Sometimes even coming with you for a little while to make sure you are not lost. As my friend said, Mumbai is so fast paced and everyone is in a tearing hurry all the time; traffic and roads could make it a really difficult city to live in if not for the warmth of the people and THAT makes all the  difference…

The mandatory goodbye 2013 post!

Gosh.. Its really been a while since i last posted. My last post seemed to be a rather inspid venting out post and i hope i have less of that.So it beens a year since we've come to mumbai. What was 2013 like? arguably one of the toughest years *b went through workwise...
As for me..Well I've been  on leave and the plan was to explore south mumbai on my own, visit chor bazaar, do all the 'mandatory things one 'must' do when one's a tourist.

Well... no surprises i did nothing! I'be just been sitting back, relaxing thinking about the year that went by. at least that's the excuse i would give anyone who would call me lazy!so 2013
1. finally I had a steady job and a job i like which is saying quite something considering the recent few years
2. I finished a year at the job which may seem like nothing to  most people but is for me
3. Travelled to the mysterious Egypt and breathtaking New Zealand 
4. My family temple which is my parents' pet project is rebuilt and im glad to see they are happy!
5. I restarted yoga which is a huuge deal for me :)
6. witnessed/witnessing my adorable nephew grow up and  seeing another side of my sister for the first time in my life.. now she has someone else to boss over!!
7.  Did a fair bit of cooking.. 


The more and more i write i realise that life is about the smaller things, and as i learn recently that its about exploring happiness under your own roof....
I hope 2014 brings me to a new phase of life..
I just need luck and the world to agree I'm ready...

sad :(

I have been meaning to write about Mumbai for a while.But today I'm feeling so down and low for completely different reason. For now let's just call it a 'complete goof up' . And that does happen very often to me and certainly not in my second month of  a new job but i just feel awful. I just want to fix things but i there is no time. It isn't entirely my fault but all of us who worked on the project thought it would come out Ok.I feel so utterly helpless and dismayed. I have not faced situation like this very often and perhaps thats why I find it difficult to deal with especially when i have no control over fixing it. We just have to deal with what we have,keep the chin up and move on

I cant wait for 2 weeks to pass when all this will be history and hopefully people will forget about it. Maybe I am being dramatic.But its an inexplicable feeling. I was just beginning to like everything and was actually considering myself lest i say,'lucky'.B* told me there's never a good time or bad time, its just time. Maybe i should listen to him more

I guess i tend to get too emotionally involved. I must decide to let things fail and allow them to never happen again. I need to be more balanced,more calm and not hyper ventilate.

Moving to Mumbai

Just under 3 years ago I packed my bags and left my friends,family and a job and moved to Singapore.I didnt know what to expect. I was a tad intimidated,bedazzled by the efficiency of public transport and enamoured by all the great food u got to ate. 3 years later  I am at waiting at the immigration counter at Mumbai and my heart sinks a bit... I know singapore has spoilt me a tad.. what with its clean cosmetic roads and all.Mumbai will be my home.. atleast for a bit.Too many people have raved about Mumbai, the magic of Mumbai...I feel a tad disloyal not ' having fallen in love' with Mumbai yet. My oldest memory of Mumbai is being stuck in a jam for 3 hours.The sights, the smells, the poverty,the chaos, the congestion assalts you the  minute you step out.I wonder whats in store

The agony of ageing!

Birthdays till a few years ago were fun! Friends get together, they'd smash cake on your face, you spend tons of money when you take out the boisterous gang out and your rejoice on your new found coolness on turning 20 or 25 or 28 even... Then 30's set in and it all changes!I hoped that I'd ring in my 31st without a murmur. I had a fantastic 30th birthday!..but i hoped my 31 would be uneventful, and would pass unnoticed. Its that age when you twist and turn in your bed and think about what you have not accomplishes, about the yoga sessions you should not have missed.....

But a day before my 31st, I got a call from B to wait  for another 30 mins for ' instructions' at 4 in the evening and then the instructions came...  we were treating ourselves to an awesome spa data with a gorgeous dinner afterwards,most of which was spent discussing whether the couple next to us were... married/ having a torrid affair while being married/ 3 rd date in a week .... all while i welcomed my favorite type of chocolate cake wishing me :)   and giggling like a sixteen year old!! Just when i thought my bday buaah was over, the boy surprised me with bunches of tickets to my fav shows for today and next week...so my bday that was supposed to be come and go without a  murmur ended up being  a week long celebration! On my 31st, I'm thankful for my a great husband, an awesome family and true friends :) i realize that at 31; I have a lot to be thankful  and grateful for!Aging.... if you would like to call it...does not seem so bad!.... atleast for now.

Arbitness

Its been 2 years since the last post was written on this blog and in an afternoon of total boredom where i dont have anything better to do, i thought might as well re connect with this.

Singapore has been a 5 minute movie playing in repeat mode. Same places, same people, same food again and again. We thought it was the place or the lack of it - but we realized that it was us - getting old, getting stuck with the same routine, being happy with the predictability and mediocrity of life.

Maybe it was worth to change - especially when you know that the things you took for granted may not be with you anymore. That is was the kick in the backside we needed to take off our blinkers and look around.

And around we looked - to a place called Arbite in a quaint little corner of Singapore that no one had dared to enter before. Being a middle aged couple with significant financial difficulties, proximity and public transport availability were critical factors.

The place was up a rickety old steps (with a hole in the wall - literally) near chomp chomp food court. Chomp chomp reminded me of bangkok red light districts - smelly, hot and R rated food being served in humungous quantities - take it or leave it style. We decided to hit that place on a calmer day when we didnt have to share our table with sweaty uncles and aunties swearing at the top of their voices for the food.

Back to Arbite - the place is small and cozy - would have been better if it were outdoors, but given our level of comfort with AC, we didnt mind. We got the last 2 seats and ordered ourselves a sangria and something called Mint cooler (knowing who wore the pants in the house, the lady got the wine while the guy got the girly green cocktail with a straw and mint leaves). The drinks were refreshing and enough to last us through dinner,

Food was ordered in a jiffy - Eggs Benedicts for the Mr and Papar Delle with Parma Ham with Mushrooms for the Mrs. The food was homely and delightful - Eggs Benedict seemed as rich and sinful (or maybe it was me reacting to egg yolk after 2 hours of hitting the gym) and the Papar Delle was as comforting as mom's home cooked soup when you are sick in bed.

The highlight was of course dessert - My wife's chocolate cake (no she doesnt cook - its the name of the dish)  - sinful dark chocolate cake with vanilla ice cream and chocolate bits. It was like tasting heavenly pleasures and hellish sins in a dish. Enough said.

Overall the trip was well worth it. Reasonable place, budget friendly, no snobbish folks, loud singaporeans having a good time and good food close by to home.

Onward to new adventures. May the blinkers remain safely tucked away.