The Small town complex & Nicolas Black

Earlier today I got a messsage from an old dear friend of mine from London that one of my old friends had walked into her house!  That's the magic of the  internet/whatsapp/messaging. ... its instant. 

But it was a kind of a special friend she had run into... And it brought back a lot of memories Almost a decade ago, this charming(in a geeky sort of way that i like) had asked me out through a friend. A nervous me decided to meet this boy for lunch. It would be harmless, plus a good meal to someone living in a pathetic hostel was always  welcome. i didn't think it would admit to much. I thought i was rather boring and run of the mill compared to the hundred of super smart articulate Bangalore girls my college boasted about( also popularly known as the small town girl complex).  Wearing  a 'reasonable' choice of clothes that was both modest and regular a.k.a boring (it was a plain baby pink collared shirt) i wanted to make the statement that i was ' just randomly stopping by and i had not thought about it at all..,.. the reality was it was the first time any of this had happened to me and i must have ironed my shirt at least 6 times before i wore it.

The boy was nice to me,let me order a lasagna from a  popular restaurant close to my college which i felt terrible about wasting partly because i was too nervous and depressed that i made  someone spend money on me (gosh... how naive was i ).But what i did remember that i had an interesting conversation when i was making sure no one from college or anyone else saw me so i was adjusting my seat most of the time and turning my head awkwardly around. I don't think i allowed myself to enjoy as much as i should  have a perfectly nice lunch. We met on and off and emailed each other(the era of usa.netand yahoo!) for a few days in the coming weeks/months but i was too much of a prude i think to take it forward. .. Like i told my friend in London, it was my self imposed moral code that stopped me from it. I think where i came from ' good girls' didn't do things like that. We were always 'friends with guys' and were going to get good jobs.. nothing else.  The potential progression to 'girlfriend status' was something that made me run in the other direction and turned me into a bundle of nerves .

 I often felt guilty to even experience  mad partying unless i was dragged out back in college days... and trust me living away from home i had enough and more opportunity.I wonder if my self imposed moral code held me back in experiencing life a little bit.

I wonder if it would have later helped me especially in the matters of the heart.I guess we arent brought up to date boys so most girls either do it behind their parents back and rebel and the other ones become like me, prudish goody two shoes inside but try to show the exterior world  that everything's cool.

I didn't remain (atleast in my head) a prude for ever and eventually did  have the guts to take things forward with a boy i liked who eventually became my husband later(no credit to me) on but i did have hiccups along the way.  I was not honest with my feelings earlier in many earlier potential relationships and my first intinct was always to run, look the other way  and not think about the complications.  But to Nicolas Black (obviously my code!) I will always be thankful for giving me the experience:) Here's to you...

A Great day...

Yesterday was a great start  to the New Year J Which is unusual considering  most new year days I usually do nothing. Perhaps it had to do with a friend in town. We sped of to ‘Britannia’,an Iranian café with an old world charm. Nestled in a  fairly European colonial looking  neighborhood which is so  far removed from the andheri east suburbs I live in it  feels like you are on holiday the minute you step inside. With a  doddering yet friendly octogenarian owner who goes around chatting up with people around and taking their orders  this little café  is all about what is written on their tissue towels ‘ There is no greater love than the love of eating’

Fussfree and minutes later,our table was full of Berry Pulao, Chicken Sali, Mutton Cutlet, and the most delicious caramel custard. Filled to the brim we set off the Chor Bazaar. Narrow streets with goats running everywhere the friendly uncles around guided us to Mutton Street . It was difficult to keep track of the 3 of us as each one would disappear into a shop and would be wonderstruck by the goodies, film posters, old gramophones, antique phones, telescopes that were on offer.  None of these things are really mandatory buys or are things ‘we need’ but we did end up picking up an antique clock  (who knows when we’ll come back).We found our way back to Taj and after leaving our car there we sort of wandered about in Colaba Causeway and finished it off with a drink at Leopald. We were exhausted by the end of the day. One thing that really stood out that no matter where we were people were so friendly and helpful. Whether they were chatting on the phone or playing a cards game with their cronies, they stopped, gave us directions..Sometimes even coming with you for a little while to make sure you are not lost. As my friend said, Mumbai is so fast paced and everyone is in a tearing hurry all the time; traffic and roads could make it a really difficult city to live in if not for the warmth of the people and THAT makes all the  difference…